Sunday 4 November 2012

Words won't do...


      Somewhere, far away,  there lies a soul. A soul which is only known to a few. And what I mean is, to a nearly insignificant number. There are these two people (or maybe they aren’t, on second thoughts) and there’s this guy, also... and oh! there’s me. I’m not overstating. Trust me, I’m not. And I have plenty evidence to prove it, that I won’t use, of course, `cause there’s simply no need, or time, or point in doing so.
What do I know about this soul? I know that it is quiet, yet extraordinary. I know that it has the ability to care truly and unconditionally. I also happen to know that it is brilliant. Tangled, however. It has this peculiar side which, over  time, I came to understand and love.
But sorely has this precious soul been challenged and full of burdens was its course. It came across the feared unknown which took it aback, so that the bewildered soul believed it lost. The truth is, it never even got the chance to fight back. The things that followed couldn’t have been more sinuous and triggered feelings coming from opposite poles, dividing a heart: joy, concern, hope, impatience, serenity, indignation, hope again, then resentment, grief and it went on until this shattered soul fell into a void of indifference and ignorance, an interiorised depression, I believe.
That’s the moment when I lost contact. I could no longer tell what it felt. I only knew the material facts, real world’s events. It was like the front gate closed (still, this has happened before) and I no longer hold a key to the back door. I blamed myself, then I blamed this entity I no longer understood, then I blamed myself again, this time knowing I was right. It took me too long to realise how much suffer this homeless soul had to endure, what painful situations it had to cope with and how deep it had been injured. Some wounds left permanent scars, whilst some others are slowly closing. Some of them may never heal.
And I’m enraged, and I’m irritated that some souls are damn hideous and broken and can do nothing but try to alter the ones standing close.
I know you have no intention to hurt anyone and I know you are not able to simply forget a tiny friend soul, not only because it won’t stop buzzing you anyway, but because it’s in your nature not to do so. Turn your head. Do you see me? Can you see me? I’m standing still, firm as a rock.
We have more in common than you can imagine (maybe you are aware of that, or maybe not). And I believe that’s the reason why our worlds, even though lonely and messed up, meet somewhere, in a place the Universe cannot comprise and the time cannot reach.
You, little old soul, must understand how dear you are to me. And there goes a tear... A candid one. I crave for you to spread your wings and fly again someday.




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